Parenting

Secrets Of Mums Who Have It All

March 18, 2018

Do you ever look at other mums and wonder how they do it? In these days of the perfect social media photos, it’s easy to think everyone else is doing a better job than you.

Better at parenting, better at keeping fit, better at juggling work and family life. But I don’t need to tell you that social media doesn’t show you the whole story, we all know that already.

If you’re still not convinced, here are the secrets of mums who have it all…

They get help

Not many mums manage to do it all by themselves. It’s ok to get help, in fact, it’s smart to get help. Whether it’s someone to pick the kids up from school or a cleaner to help you keep the house looking presentable, don’t be afraid to ask for help.

They struggle to balance

Some women might make it look easy, but juggling a career and kids is anything but. You might have the perfect plan in place to allow you to get to work on time but one sick child or a last minute assembly can send everything tumbling down. Being a working mum is all about balance and the perfect balance requires a lot of juggling.

They get less sleep

Whether it’s getting up at the crack of down to exercise before work or staying up late to get work finished, sometimes the only way to get everything done is to find more time. Unless there’s a magic trick I don’t know about, the only way to find more time is by sleeping less.

They cheat

Just because you don’t see these perfect mums posting photos on social media of the kids using tablets when they want some peace or the ready meal they’ve stuck in the microwave, it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t happen. And don’t get me started on the perfect selfies – one word: filters.

They feel guilty

Even if they look like they’ve got it all together, every mum feels guilty on a regular basis. It may not be over the big things, but we all lie awake at night stressing over something that’s happened that day. Whether it was shouting too much or being a few minutes late to pick the kids up from school. Unfortunately, it’s just part of being a mum.

They lie

If any mum says she doesn’t do the above then she’s lying. I am a firm believer that no mum has it all, no matter what they say. If they’ve got the career then they probably feel guilty about missing their kids or a school event. If they look like they have the work-life balance with part-time hours then they may be struggling to get everything done at work or to bring home enough money.

So next time you look at those perfect Instagram photos and start stressing because you don’t have it all together, just remember that it’s probably not all as perfect as it looks!

Mummy in a Tutu

14 Comments

mommamack15

some great tips and advice here which I can definitely relate to, i’m currently in the process of getting Hubby to agree to a cleaner, I work full time so don’t want to spend weekends cleaning when we can be having family fun together #familyfunlinky

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Ali Duke

It is hard for us mum’s to find a balance. I work part time, but as you said I still seem to never have enough time to do everything and I worry about money all the time. I wish I could afford a cleaner, the help would be great lol.
#FamilyFun

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The Nuthatch Nest

So true! Some days I feel like I’ve half got it together, other days not so much and I wonder how the hell they do it but you’re right, they don’t, it’s often smoke and mirrors but if that’s how people want to appear then whatever makes them happy.
#sharethebloglove

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Tubbs

They edit just like the rest of us! Only maybe slightly more successfully and ruthlessly 🙂

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Emma T

I don’t know how single parents do it, especially those without family nearby. I’m lucky because I can compress my hours slightly, and we have all family within 2 miles and a cousin at the same school to help out fairly last minute if needed. Plus the OH works on the farm at home, so while I have to do all sick days etc (I can work from home) he can pick up some holiday slack because he can take N to work with him. But I don’t feel guilty for working. Disappointed that I can’t make certain events. But not guilty. I’m giving N a good life without having to worry about money or enjoying the weekends. The only bit I’m terrible at is housework. I just don’t do it until really needed – but that’s mostly because I hate doing it, and I begrudge the way neither the OH or N helps by clearing up after themselves. #sharingthebloglove

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Red Rachel

Thank you for the reminder that no one is perfect. I always find myself comparing myself to other mums and feeling bad that they seem to be holding it together better than me. Your points are very true. We need to give ourselves a break. I wish I could afford a cleaner as I think that would really help me get ahead. With regards to sleeping less, I think I would struggle with that one as I love my bed! #KCACOLS

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Lydia C. Lee

I just read an article on ‘why parenting is so much harder in the SM age’. I find it hard to understand that we became such sheep and so concerned with others and how we appear to others. I see the pretty pictures but I really don’t think twice about them (in fact if it’s kids stuff I tend to just scroll on past – it’s the travel photos that catch my eye). Then there’s the weird thing, that if you complain on SM, people don’t like that either….so really, use it how you want to use it, and be happy with what’s in your life. And if you aren’t, then change it. But the standard is YOUR standard, not anyone elses….#KCACOLS

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Alana - Burnished Chaos

So so true. You never see what is going on behind the scenes and outward appearances can be so deceptive. Everyone needs help and everyone has to make compromises. All we can ever do is OUR best.
Thank you for joining the #FamilyFunLinky x

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Carol Cameleon

Oh yes, there’s always a story behind a photo and it’s always ‘tinged’ with reality! I gave up with comparisonitis a long while ago, I have to say! #kcacols

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Katy - Hot Pink Wellingtons

So much of this is spot on! I often look at my sister, who always seems to have it so much more together than me. But she sees nothing shameful in asking for help – whether that’s help with the children, with cleaning her house, with DIY around the house, financial help. She leans on people a lot more than I do – and on the flip side, she’s a very generous person too, so I know she’d be willing to help me if I asked, I just don’t tend to ask. She’s also a bit of a liar! She insists her children sleep through the night from a very young age – when I pushed her on it recently, it turned out she was popping into her youngest regularly to pop her dummy back in but “that doesn’t count”! Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

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Kerry

Too true, it’s impossible to have it all, and exhausting trying too! I think I’m happier now I accept that if work is busy my house is a mess, and vice versa. As long as were happy that’s all I strive for these days.Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time.

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Laura@dearbearandbean

I agree no one has to all together. If everyone was just a little bit more honest about what life is really like, then it would make it so much easier for everyone. The pressure would be less and we wouldn’t have the guilt that we do. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

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Cheryl @ Tea or Wine

So true! I think we are all guilty of doing these. I definitely agree with your last point; we can’t truly have it all. There will be elements of guilt whether we’re working, not working or working part time. #KCACOLS

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Lisa Pomerantz

Since there is no having it all, I am pretty happy with what we have! #kcacols xoxo

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